How To...Handle Anxiety
Okay guys, this is something we need to have a real conversation about…I hope you’re ready! Anxiety is such a real struggle that so many of us face on a daily basis and have begun to accept as a normal part of our lives. Anxiety isn’t going to benefit you in any way, yet it takes away so much peace from your life daily…and in 2018 we’re claiming that peace back ASAP! Anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. When you allow anxiety to win, you’re giving unnecessary energy over something that hasn’t even happened yet.
Anxiety is a real feeling and I am in no way attempting to minimize it’s effects. One of my very best friend deals with a great deal of anxiety and her problems are my problems (and vice versa), therefore I have dealt with the effects of anxiety frequently. In those moments the fear of what could happen is a very real fear, and often times seems impossible to overcome. What I would like you’ll to understand is that fear is just like any other feeling we experience, it is real and has a true purpose but we cannot allow that feeling to control our actions or behaviors. So how do we handle anxiety?...Here’s your how to guide!
1. Find your peace
I want you to take a deep long thought and evaluate how in tune you are with your peace and all that it means to live a peaceful life. It’s very easy to allow the stressors of life to add up and if you aren’t taking time for yourself it can become overwhelming before you even realize. That one phone call you answer from work on your day off, the unnecessary family drama you always find yourself in, the constant overthinking, the financial stress that could be avoided by proper management…it all adds up. Then one day you look up and you’re facing a giant called anxiety and you don’t know how to change things. The absolute first step is to find your peace.
Take the time to understand what are your effect methods to maximize your peace and learn what adds value to your life. Finding your peace is not always easy, but it’s possible through quality and consistent alone time. I need you to fully accept that you deserve peace and it’s well within your realm of possibility, but you have to find your peace internally first! If your entire world is chaotic, I would question what your internal peace looks like. When you find your peace, you can be sitting in the middle of complete chaos and it not enter your world.
2. Protect your peace
When you have had to take the time to find your peace during a time when peace felt completely impossible, you will also learn to appreciate and protect that peace. It is your responsibility to ensure there is a guard around your peace, if someone is stealing your peace it’s because you’ve given them the keys. I speak from experience when I say this, and I’m sharing it with love because I absolutely want the best for you! There was once a time when the quality of my day was completely dependent on those around me; my boss could send me into a rage within minutes, some guy I’m dating could have me questioning life, my family could have me stressed for no reason, and my biggest stressor was always my finances.
I recently took a leave of absence from my job and it allowed me to spend necessary alone time and focus on my healing, goals, and redirect my focuses. Now that I have done so, I am very diligent about what I allow to enter my world. Even when I returned to my very chaotic work environment, I’m focused on my peace and I ensure that I do not allow the stressors to internalize and take residence in my heart. It’s a daily and conscious effort I have to make, but it’s very much worth it when I begin to have frequent good days at work when just months ago the job practically killed me!
3. Plan what you can
Organization and planning is very critical towards preventing anxiety to creep into your life and especially not allowing anxiety to control your life. Far too many times our anxiety begins to add up because we failed to plan, procrastinated, or was extremely unorganized in a particular area of life. For me, I dealt with financial anxiety for YEARS and the ultimate solution was due to me lack of organization and planning. Once I began to take a proactive approach to my financial life, the anxiety began to decrease exponentially and aggressively.
What areas are causing you the most intense or most consistent levels of anxiety? If there is a pattern in your life (please be honest with yourself!) begin to create a plan to tackle the problem area head on. It’s one thing to be aware of what you’re struggle areas are when it comes to anxiety, but what are you willing to do to change it for the better? Is it school? Work? Finances? Love? Family? Children (or lack thereof)? Physical fitness? What is it that’s causing you anxiety in your life?
4. Let go of what you can’t change
There are going to be things that you cannot change or make different in your life, it’s a natural part of the journey. For the things you have zero control over, what is the point of adding stress to your life? This type of anxiety, while extremely valid is something you can manage. It starts with having the right perspective and making a decision to not stress over something you can’t change or impact. A lot of times we have this type of anxiety over the past, it’s done and you cannot do anything to change it…so stop giving it so much control over your present and your future.
One thing that you have absolutely zero control over is the opinions of others! What someone else thinks about you is NONE of your business and should not take up too much mental space. Stop allowing others to take up so much residence in your mind, there are so many other things that you could spend your time thinking about. Like slaying those goals of yours right?
5. Love yourself first
Self-love is absolutely at the center of everything and if you get that piece right, everything else will fall into place naturally. When you learn the true value of yourself you begin to recognize that you deserve better than the stress and physical manifestation that comes along with stress and anxiety. You will begin to protect your peace and ensure that you place boundaries on those around you. Keep in mind, self-love is a lifetime process and is not something that is going to happen overnight…sit back and enjoy the ride of life! When you face a problem and your initial reaction is to begin down the road of anxiety, ask yourself if it is something you have control over? If so, do everything you can…if not, learn to accept it.